tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41165192011-12-13T20:56:17.481-07:00miscarriage obsessions, celebrity miscarriage, miscarriage in the news...survival for the miscarrying woman. For complete blog, go to <a href="http://www.babyfruit.com/">Babyfruit.com</a>Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.comBlogger821100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1166139208043640322006-12-14T16:31:00.000-07:002006-12-14T16:33:28.053-07:00

I've been blogging over at Typepad for a while. Stop by for the whole story!

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130973458322246652005-11-01T16:16:00.000-07:002005-11-02T16:17:38.323-07:00

Had a terribly restless sleep last night. Very non-specific uncomfortableness, every position I tossed or turned into seemed...dangerous. I was certain I was killing the embryo somehow by the way my body was twisted.This morning, I didn't feel pregnant. Maybe I did, but I couldn't coax a sore boob or bit of queasiness out of my body. I was saddened by this, and G. was concerned. But I didn't want

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130973389956423072005-10-31T16:16:00.000-07:002005-11-02T16:16:29.956-07:00

Well, I still have pregnancy symptoms, so that's a plus. Of course, my boobs were killing me last night each time I got up to pee. And this morning, I felt queasy enough that getting out of bed was not an attractive option. I mentioned it to G. who started kissing my hand and telling me how happy he was that I nauseous, or something to that effect. Gotta love my hubby.Progesterone today was 23.7

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130973350833608512005-10-28T16:14:00.000-06:002005-11-02T16:15:50.850-07:00

Okay, Chewie is resting comfortably, and I'm ready to lay down for a while. I decided to make Shepherd's Pie for dinner with homemade mashed potatoes, and it is ready to be popped into the oven. And I vaccuumed. I'm a Domestic Goddess.And, I'm pregnant. Yes, I'm saying it now. I am pregnant. I am pregnant, hear me roar.I know that we are still not out of the Pregnancy Twilight Zone but my hCG is

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130389227149405312005-10-26T16:59:00.000-06:002005-10-26T23:00:27.150-06:00

1. Today's Levels:hcG 11583 no longer a problem that they are not doubling - they are rising so that is goodProgesterone - 25.7back up from 21.1 now that I'm doing suppositories 3x a day. Good sign.2. Will do levels again Friday. If progesterone looks sketchy - or if I get nervous - we can start progesterone shots DAILY in the BUTT for 4 WEEKS. Once Week 10 rolls around, if things still look

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130389138338506452005-10-24T22:58:00.000-06:002005-10-26T22:58:58.340-06:00

Okay, don't know what to think or feel but here it is.hCG levels - 9176prog 21.1Found this out around 11:30am and thought "what the fuck?" My levels have never been this high and even though technically they did not double in 72 hours, they were only a mere 300 under doubling. What the hell is going on?Got the Sonogram at 1pm and...We saw the heartbeat flicker.We couldn't hear it but the

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130389103358885422005-10-21T22:58:00.000-06:002005-10-26T22:58:23.360-06:00

Well, this is probably one of the last entries under the category Pregnancy #5. Stay tuned for Miscarriage #5.Levels were 4733.2 days ago they were 3491.Okay, that is that. Sorry to bring everyone on yet another rollercoaster ride but there it is.Silver lining? Okay, let's spin this:1. My elevated FSH levels mean it will be harder for me to get pregnant. Then again, I got pregnant first try

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130389064973130192005-10-19T22:57:00.000-06:002005-10-26T22:57:44.976-06:00

Okay, first I have to say thank you to everyone for your amazing on-Babyfruit and off-blog support - I can't tell you how much it means to me to hear everyone's perspectives so I'm not trapped in the vortex of my own incessant brain babble.Now, I must warn you that any positive things you may say at this time will fill me with absolute rage, but go ahead, do whatever you want. This is a free

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130389036663742742005-10-17T22:57:00.000-06:002005-10-26T22:57:16.666-06:00

hCG - 1901 (up from 509 on Friday so more than tripled)prog - 29.6 (down from 39.2 Friday - still okay in their book)Well, cannot say that I'm hopeful exactly but I did call to schedule my Oct 24 sonogram - the 6 weeks check for viability. That sure will piss me off if the levels look good this week but the sonogram sucks. On to cravings...Okay, is it a craving when you want hard pretzels and

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1129571424066498372005-10-15T11:49:00.000-06:002005-10-17T11:53:54.053-06:00

I've spent most of the day in a reclining position, finishing reading my first chick lit book ever - "Good Grief" by Lolly Winston. Have another to read next - "Good in Bed" by Jennifer Weiner.I've been feeling very crampy and thought I was staining a little after a long walk with G. last night. It was much more of a vigorous walk than I had wanted or intended and have felt tired ever since.So

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1129231817839419372005-10-13T13:29:00.000-06:002005-10-13T13:30:17.846-06:00

Early this morning, after G. got up to shower, I tried to assess if I felt pregnant yet. I was feeling decidedly not pregnant without sore boobs, no nausea, nothing.I decided to invite the Positive, Happy, Pregnancy Vibes into my being and basically just thought happy, pregnancy thoughts and happy-to-be-pregnant thoughts. I tried to imagine positive pregnancy energy flowing through me. I sent

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1129058704721352452005-10-11T13:24:00.000-06:002005-10-11T13:25:04.726-06:00

Regardless of how many pregnancies and miscarriages, I cannot believe I'm still immediately entering this obsessive zone where every little thing is significant, telling and earth shattering.1. Boob Check - We constantly lift our shirts, remove our bras, stare into the bathroom mirror and wonder "Are they bigger? Are they getting just a little bit bigger yet? And are the aureoles changing color,

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1129055330806491152005-10-11T12:28:00.000-06:002005-10-11T12:28:50.806-06:00

Thought that post title would be a grabber. Ah, the wonders of needles and suppositories. I know you are all dying to hear the details. And I would never disappoint because my goal is to let you into the glamorous world of multiple miscarriage and wacky freaky things we must do to our bodies and our selves to try to hold on to this microscopic alien inside.As the time drew near for my first

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1129055298500116962005-10-10T20:28:00.000-06:002005-10-11T12:28:18.500-06:00

Back to the old level-checking drawing board. I've been here before. Actually, I've been here 5 times before. Deja vu.hCG - 51Prog 21.9Should be starting Week 5.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1129055270050850352005-10-10T18:27:00.000-06:002005-10-11T12:27:50.056-06:00

It is offical - or as official as a cheap Home Pregnancy Test will confirm at the moment. I'm pregnant again. My period is 4 days late. I did my best not to obsess over dates and did an HPT on what should have been Day 1 of my cycle. It was negative. So the HPT test taken today was the first positive one because I refrained from taking any more tests for a few days, drank a little wine, acted as

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1130389013828478072005-10-06T22:56:00.000-06:002005-10-26T22:56:53.840-06:00

Well, I have heard from many many sources that you aren't supposed to have pregnancy symptoms until the 6th week. But so far, for every pregnancy, I've had symptoms - intermittently - from implantation on. Then when I have a miscarriage, the symptoms disappearing are the first sign for me that something has gone wrong. Maybe I'm hypersensitive, maybe I'm totally in tune with my body or maybe I'm

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1128388353902362262005-10-03T19:11:00.000-06:002005-10-03T19:12:59.163-06:00

In the previous post, I talked about my anger issues and probably need for anger management after miscarriage.And in that cosmic way that things happen at the right time, regardless of what they are, I received the following Daily Om - the daily empowering message I get for free via email.Emotional FreedomDealing with powerful emotions can be challenging, especially when we are going through

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1128388276398577422005-10-02T19:10:00.000-06:002005-10-03T19:11:16.400-06:00

So after careful self-examination, I realize that yes, indeed, I'm having some anger issues. I have a feeling that over the last few months I was having grief issues and now they have transformed into anger issues. I have to admit that it goes beyond my usual snarkiness and is just boiling over more than I'd like it to.What to do about anger? How to let it out constructively. My very nature is to

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1128388230914743902005-09-26T19:09:00.000-06:002005-10-03T19:10:30.920-06:00

I'd love to hear from Babyfruit lurkers and regulars alike - are you conceiving yet? Where are you in your quest for baby? What have you tried? Is adoption looking like the way you want to go? Inquiring minds want to know.Right now, I'm a Misbehaving Miscarrying Woman, at least I'm not following all the rules.I'm playing Russian Roulette with G.'s sperm, those strong swimming, pregnancy-inducing

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1126379315073401562005-09-10T13:07:00.000-06:002005-09-10T13:08:35.080-06:00

I'm clearly in a funk or some phase of miscarriage melancholia. Here are 10 reasons I may be in a funk...1. I might be paranoid but it seems that when I make a joke about pregnant women or female reproductive health in my usual sarcastic way, everyone looks at me with pity or with that deer-in-the-headlights look that seems to say "What am I supposed to do now? Laugh? Cluck sympathetically?

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1126059506557294972005-09-06T20:18:00.000-06:002005-09-06T20:18:26.566-06:00

I'm being productive after neglecting Babyfruit and miscarriage blogging for a few days. Here are some recent articles about miscarriage.PGD May Ease Miscarriage Risk After IVF in Older Patients - Women over age 35 who've experienced repeat miscarriage may be able to ease their risk of having another pregnancy loss following in vitro fertilization (IVF) by having their embryos tested for genetic

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1125599985843124962005-09-01T12:38:00.000-06:002005-09-01T12:39:45.846-06:00

Link: Celebrity Baby Blog.Thoughts from a Woman 3 Months After Miscarriage...Everywhere I look, there are babies, babies and more babies.Britney held her belly on the cover of PEOPLE.Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck were captured kissing, his hand on her bump. (And Jen is into prenatal yoga).Angelina and Brad are wanting to "adopt many many babies." (And Jennifer Aniston is pissed off about it.)

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1125006766580405052005-08-25T15:50:00.000-06:002005-08-25T15:52:46.580-06:00

Regarding miscarriage blogs and copyrights, there is some good discussion happening behind the scenes again in comments, and I wanted to bring it forward. Regarding miscarriage blogs and specifically Chez Miscarriage and how Chez removed the archives to her blog, everyone has the right to do whatever the heck they want with their blog, however, her reason for removing them is bugging the snot out

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1125006612473417262005-08-25T15:49:00.000-06:002005-08-25T15:50:12.473-06:00

Link: Chez Miscarriage: Maternity Leave.Hmmm...Someone pointed out that Chez of Chez Miscarriage took away her archives. Now I do take issue with that. It is one thing stopping your blog, but the beauty of the blogosphere is that the archives - which those by Chez have proven to be well-read and valuable - can remain forever.She points out that she began blogging anonymously and maintained her

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1125006514949382472005-08-25T15:47:00.000-06:002005-08-25T15:48:34.956-06:00

New on Forbes.com...an article about miscarriage!Medical Option Now Available After MiscarriageBy Serena GordonHealthDay Reporter WEDNESDAY, Aug. 24 (HealthDay News) -- Until recently, if a woman had a miscarriage early in her pregnancy, doctors often had to perform surgery to remove any remaining fetal tissue.But according to new study findings, the medication misoprostol also may be an option

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1124939780634803262005-08-24T21:16:00.000-06:002005-08-24T21:47:24.976-06:00

Miscarriage and hair salons, you ask? No, this isn't revealing some new report out there that says hair coloring causes miscarriage, although during the last two years, I have colored my hair quite sparingly, only in true "beauty" emergencies such as on camera appearances and never when pregnant, just in case.No, miscarriage and hair salons refers to my hair coloring experience today (remember,

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1080585149031597752004-03-29T11:31:00.000-07:002004-03-29T11:36:13.763-07:00

I'm posting now on my new blog at http://babyfruit.typepad.com/baby. Much nicer interface and features. See you there!

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1080232938159283002004-03-25T09:39:00.000-07:002004-03-25T09:45:41.936-07:00

I'm still having pain/discomfort. Sort of a U shape at my lower abdomen, a smiley if it wasn't such a pain. Making an appointment next week but not sure with whom. Doctor? OB/gyn? Naturopath? Who could really help me? Staining, brownish discharge, which usually means the bleeding is tapering off but hasn't totally stopped. It has been a month since the miscarriage.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1080070060913589382004-03-23T12:22:00.000-07:002004-03-23T12:31:02.390-07:00

walked again today. felt much better. still weak - and I hate to be weak - but that comes with the territory. my fake period is almost over. but just when I think the bleeding has stopped for a day, there it is again. enough already, let's get on to being healthy and normal, shall we? had a massage today - I believe in the preventative benefits of therapeutic massage. And I've had a rough

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1079974198559294932004-03-22T09:35:00.000-07:002004-03-22T09:53:18.293-07:00

Feeling almost normal. Still. But did go for a walk today. Not the usual hour-long that G. and I were doing before I was pregnant, but a good start. Still bleeding a little, like a period tapering off. A fake period as in I did not ovulate but am bleeding. Now if my period starts up again in 28 days from the first day I started bleeding, then we're back on track. I had my checkup on March 18

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1079670758286424112004-03-18T21:30:00.000-07:002004-03-18T21:35:53.733-07:00

went to my followup checkup. there are no answers to most of my questions - and the information I'm getting is the same that I read in books from 1979. spooky. I'm bleeding again but it is like a period without cramping - just mild uncomfortableness. It is like a fake period. Supposedly, it is safe to use tampons now - 3 weeks after the miscarriage. I'll use them sparingly but they are sure a

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1079046819845168662004-03-11T16:09:00.000-07:002004-03-11T16:16:45.920-07:00

after spotting and staining a little every day for last week or so, and just as it was tapering off, suddenly, lots of bright red blood. by lots, I mean more than spotting or staining but less than soaking through a pad. still, it was a big, unwelcome surprise. I called the women's clinic and the nurse assured me it was normal - that I was still expelling more stuff out of my uterus. I thought

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1078779144351871372004-03-08T13:35:00.000-07:002004-03-08T13:58:49.543-07:00

After reading "The DaVinci Code," I've become obsessed with the truth about Mary Magdalene and the Holy Grail mythology. This isn't a religion-inspired interest but more a feeling that I'm discovering a historical basis for the removal of the feminine from our fundamental teachings, religions, power structure, etc. The reason I bring this up is because I feel there is a fundamental flaw in our

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1078504553653943072004-03-05T09:31:00.000-07:002004-03-05T09:40:01.826-07:00

back from an out-of-town trip. felt nearly normal which was a great relief. you never realize what normal feels like until you don't feel it. then when you do, normal actually feels unfamiliar! still spotting but not bleeding. still have pangs/aches mostly on the left side (of my uterus). went for a morning walk with G. and the dogs. a slow, leisurely pace but you've got to start somewhere.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1078244344940342442004-03-02T09:14:00.000-07:002004-03-02T09:21:58.796-07:00

I'm one degree away from feeling back to normal. But that one degree is a bitch. Every time I'm certain things are okay, I feel pain again or start to bleed again. But today, I feel like "me," or whatever "me" is like after a second miscarriage. G. is back from a weekend away, and it is good to have him here. I try not to feel like a burden, and he is so willing to help. Being in a solid

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1078083008861306992004-02-29T12:27:00.000-07:002004-02-29T12:33:53.606-07:00

I shouldn't be sitting at the computer yet, but here I am again. I'll go back to bed in a minute, I promise. I'm working on the book idea. I have ten tentative chapters and a tentative title... "First 3 Months: A Holistic, Realistic Look at the First Trimester" I'm putting up information on how to submit your own personal stories for the book on a web site which I'll reveal once it is ready.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1078017247352094112004-02-28T18:13:00.000-07:002004-02-28T18:17:13.746-07:00

I should have more of a sense of humor about this whole thing like getupgrrl at chez miscarriage. Well, gotta go bleed.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1078016412268827622004-02-28T17:58:00.000-07:002004-02-28T18:03:02.733-07:00

I shouldn't be moving around. One minute I'm healing, the next, bleeding again. I shouldn't be sitting at the computer but I'm in that obsessive mode where I must be doing something. I should be in bed. Healing can be so boring.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1078007130247858202004-02-28T15:21:00.000-07:002004-02-28T15:28:20.233-07:00

I feel like a human being. I feel "normal." I'm in one piece. My body is slowly healing, and I feel it happening each moment. I do feel like I've been kicked in the belly but my energy is back. I can sit up at the computer for a little while now, without feeling a lot of pain. Just mild discomfort. But I have been resting, reclining, too. Trust your body. That is the message I keep getting.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1077929834060616832004-02-27T17:24:00.000-07:002004-02-27T18:00:02.420-07:00

I have a clean uterus. At least that is what the doctor's nurse said after I had an ultrasound today. The pain was increasing, not decreasing, and bleeding was very steady - not heavy but not lessening. So I called in to get checked out. They took my levels and then they did an ultrasound. It seems my body was able to expel everything it needed to, totally on its own. Guess I didn't need

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1077808998783055422004-02-26T08:17:00.000-07:002004-02-26T08:26:05.750-07:00

the process: On Tuesday, light cramps in the morning. By midday, stronger along with nausea. Intense and excrutiating, really. Finally needed more pads but G., bless his male heart, brought the wrong kind. Actually, the right kind based on my description, but not big enough. So he drove me to the store and I hobbled down the aisles to get bigger pads. I educated him about sanitary napkins and we

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1077808222428257972004-02-26T08:06:00.000-07:002004-02-26T08:13:09.576-07:00

the process, the process. the body knows what needs to be done. the mind is doing its own thing and I have to bring it back to the process. I keep wanting to get up and work on the computer (here I am again) and sitting up hurts right now. there is no more excruciating cramping pain, it is just a low, dull, streaking ache across my abdomen. the bleeding is still there - not heavy but consistent

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1077649194275309332004-02-24T11:44:00.000-07:002004-02-24T12:02:38.326-07:00

bleeding has started - very light but something has shifted. I had an extemely intense reflexology treatment yesterday by an RN who has been doing reflexology for 20 years. she said she has induced labor - uterine contractions - before so seemed confident she could help. sure enough, small cramps last night and this morning, bleeding starting. right now more like darkish brown and not heavy but

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1077478320395115032004-02-22T12:25:00.000-07:002004-02-22T12:34:42.200-07:00

doing everything to give Mother Nature a nudge. Had reflexology including a lesson for G. and me on how to administer it properly. had a full body massage to de-stress and more reflexology followed by a consultation with a Chinese herbalist and accupuncturist who did a treatment and gave me some herbs. have had light cramping, very light. just feeling overall drained. not happy about anything

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1077244643900826102004-02-19T19:34:00.000-07:002004-02-19T19:40:02.076-07:00

tomorrow I'll get my most recent levels. as far as the doctor and I are concerned, we know that with levels dropping, all signs point to a non-viable pregnancy. but G. wants to hold out until tomorrow morning just in case, holding out hope. gotta love that man. I'm feeling just sick, physically and emotionally. Physically headache, nausea, bloaty, achey. Emotionally drained, sad, pained. I want

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1077046415852681582004-02-17T12:28:00.000-07:002004-02-17T12:36:11.046-07:00

my levels are going down. 5810 as of yesterday afternoon. that pretty much confirms that this isn't going to work out. we'll try again - maybe just one more time. maybe 3rd time will be the charm, as they say. tomorrow they will do an ultrasound to make sure everything is actually in the uterus (and not in the fallopian tube or somewhere errant ie. an ectopic pregnancy). as long as it is in the

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076973908045151292004-02-16T16:20:00.000-07:002004-02-16T16:27:42.246-07:00

I finally feel like I'm not a crazy woman. When I went in for my prenatal screening labwork this afternoon, I told them how I was feeling and how my HCG levels were "lower than they would have expected" last week. The women in the lab shook their heads. "Then why are they having you do a prenatal screening right now? It is a waste of money." Then they went to ask one of the doctors who looked

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076965396013407072004-02-16T13:48:00.000-07:002004-02-16T14:05:50.390-07:00

another day of feeling nothing unusual. other than discharge. yes, you're reading a pregnancy journal so you'll have to get used to those kinds of things. After searching books for discharge and finding entries that any discharge is not a good sign, I finally found several books that said that as long as the discharge is clearish, then it is very normal, throughout pregnancy. of course, that

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076859179008597832004-02-15T08:26:00.000-07:002004-02-15T08:35:31.466-07:00

took a walk yesterday and it packed a wallop. nothing strenuous or long, a flat road and a casual stroll with all the dogs. But it was at 8000 feet, and I'm living at 7200 so there was some elevation difference. Not sure if that was enough to affect me. But within an hour, my legs felt like they were hollowed out and stiff. impossible to walk normally. Like I had run a marathon and my muscles

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076717128611979172004-02-13T17:02:00.000-07:002004-02-13T17:07:59.140-07:00

I've tried to be less obsessive. Yes, a challenge for me, I know, but it seems to be working. I'll have my first official prenatal lab work done Monday, then my first prenatal exam Thursday of next week. Then I'll sign up for the Quad Screening in March (for genetic defects). Other than that, I'm feeling pretty normal. A smidge queasy when I haven't eaten for a few hours - like right now - so

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076464831753419362004-02-10T18:59:00.000-07:002004-02-10T19:02:58.420-07:00

I did figure out that the midwife was not miscalculating. Her gestation wheel was figuring differently than one that I had. I found a second one at the house and it corresponded with her initial estimate - that on Thursday when I had the last levels done, I was on the first day of my 6th week. My other wheel said middle of the 5th. So the levels were probably on the low side. whatever. don't

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076464741617621172004-02-10T18:54:00.000-07:002004-02-10T19:01:27.483-07:00

yesterday, I was feeling pretty normal. a little tired. but nothing too unusual. when I don't eat frequently, I do get a little queasy and dizzy, so I try to eat something the moment those feelings come on. one day the boobs hurt, the next day they don't. one day they look like someone else's breasts, the next day, they look like the ones I remember having all these years. I opted not to

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076255755117471742004-02-08T08:47:00.000-07:002004-02-08T08:58:17.810-07:00

there is a possibility that the midwife was calculating my pregnancy based on an incorrect date I originally put in my records when I went to see them for the first time - the "getting to know you but I'm not pregnant yet" visit. I had forgotten to record the first day of my last period (December) and could not remember when it was. So I put Dec 19, my birthday, but later realized that was

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076114160689988232004-02-06T17:34:00.000-07:002004-02-06T17:38:21.623-07:00

according to one chart I found online, 6 weeks should have an HCG level of about 1,080 - 56,500. Now that is quite a big range. I need to see what else is out there. The midwife called to say my HCG level is 7000 - not as high as she would think for 6 weeks. Then she suggested I get an ultrasound next week at the hospital. Not that she felt anything was wrong but for my peace of mind. She said

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076088315686678502004-02-06T10:23:00.000-07:002004-02-06T10:27:42.030-07:00

awaiting levels. feeling quite normal. not sure if normal is good or not. woke up this morning feeling like I had run a marathon overnight. even just laying there, not moving, made me a little out of breath. went to my exercise class - trying to keep up the fitness. blend of yoga and pilates. I think it will be very helpful to continue this type of fitness regime as time goes on. cautiously

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1076010429541386242004-02-05T12:43:00.000-07:002004-02-05T12:49:28.763-07:00

welcome to my pregnancy rollercoaster. I'm awaiting the results from today's HCG level blood test, and the more I read and after speaking to the midwife, I'm sure that everything is fine. Am I always this obsessed with information? Yes, I believe so. I just want to understand, I told the midwife. She was commenting on how the first trimester is so unpredictable and difficult to control which

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075993586115749252004-02-05T08:05:00.000-07:002004-02-05T08:08:45.496-07:00

here are my levels based on 3 previous tests every 48+ hours: Jan 26 Mon - HCG 711 / Prog 33.7 Jan 28 Wed - HCG 1920 / Prog 33.1 Jan 30 Fri - HCG 3400 / Prog 28.1 let's see what we have now.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075993340956264332004-02-05T07:59:00.000-07:002004-02-05T08:04:40.356-07:00

symptom check: no sore breasts cramping throughout the night/early a.m. but no spotting... Not sure what any of this means but I'm going to see if I can get another blood test today just to check how my hormone levels correlate with symptoms. I want data. Worried about the cramping but the more I read, the more it seems that as long as the cramping is not accompanied by bleeding, then it could

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075941826984551832004-02-04T17:43:00.000-07:002004-02-04T17:46:05.200-07:00

from http://www.beyondfertility.com/hpmsfaq.htm Can natural progesterone be used during a pregnancy?� In his book, "Premenstrual Syndrome & You", Neils H. Lauersen, M.D., from Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York, states that natural progesterone may be helpful to maintain pregnancy. The cream in not only safe for use during pregnancy but is recommended. From conception to delivery, apply

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075941590910492872004-02-04T17:33:00.000-07:002004-02-04T17:42:09.153-07:00

symptom check woke up with mild cramping, lower abdomen. took a morning walk. G. and I had been walking an hour each morning but stopped about a week ago or so due to schedules. this walk knocked me for a loop. way too exhausted from it - should take it easier next time. supposedly some of that exhaustion during exertion comes from the increased blood volume in the body during pregnancy making

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075855928697039572004-02-03T17:45:00.000-07:002004-02-03T18:03:02.623-07:00

From http://www.webwomb.com/hpt_levels_hcg_levels.htm How Pregnancy Is Detected When a women becomes pregnant her body starts to produce a hormone called HcG (Human Chorionic Gonadotropin) this hormone is what is detected in both urine and blood based tests to give a positive pregnancy result.� This page gives an average range of HcG levels found in � pregnant women at 10 - 22 days past

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075855423476949122004-02-03T17:42:00.000-07:002004-02-03T17:46:00.186-07:00

OK, levels from Friday were HCG 3400 Progesterone 28.1 I'm going to find a chart online that has level ranges. There has to be something that I can use as a guideline. Today, taught another 4 hour class in the next town over - tired. Moments of feeling a little faint but nothing too dangerous. Tired.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075794401813774502004-02-03T00:29:00.000-07:002004-02-03T00:48:57.576-07:00

my HCG levels doubled again. don't have numbers in front of me - will get later. cannot sleep. too much stuff on my mind. some financial issues, some work issues but mostly wondering about this altered state my body is in and thinking about it lasting for 9 months. what a big undertaking. this is something I've wanted for a long time but the reality of it has yet to fully sink in and as it

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-107569832581803702004-02-01T22:02:00.000-07:002004-02-01T22:07:40.686-07:00

maybe I'm having wishful nausea, I'm not sure, but I have been feeling a bit queasy this afternoon and evening. more pronounced in between meals. so far, no spotting which is good. I'm at about 5 weeks 4 days, give or take a day. I can't believe I'm hoping I get queasier. I'd take it as a good sign.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075611878633416882004-01-31T22:01:00.000-07:002004-01-31T22:06:52.170-07:00

rested all day to get over a little cold. but overall, feeling no symptoms at all. my mind imagines all sorts of things so I'm just trying to relax. all the books talk about nausea and the other typical symptoms. not feeling any of them all day. I feel like I'll be relieved if I get morning sickness, even though I hate feeling queasy. At least it would mean something is still happening.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075568550330451032004-01-31T10:00:00.000-07:002004-01-31T10:04:43.233-07:00

fighting off a cold so taking it easy this weekend. of course, I always feel totally non-productive when I'm trying to rest and relax. luckily, I rented 5 movies to keep me occupied. can't take cold medicine or my homeopathic remedies which always nip things in the bud. have to rely on rest and plenty of fluids. took G.'s lab Ebb for a walk in the park this morning. must keep up the exercise.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075507728411276412004-01-30T17:07:00.000-07:002004-01-30T17:11:00.296-07:00

symptom check: sore breasts not much else Went to get more blood drawn - 3rd time - every 48 hours. Should I keep doing this? $92 each time and I haven't yet met my medical insurance deductible. Maybe if it has doubled again, we can wait a few weeks. I will make an appointment for my "first" exam around 8th week. I don't want to be paranoid. I just want to have data.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075507622934688912004-01-30T17:00:00.000-07:002004-01-30T17:09:14.843-07:00

G. had a dream this morning that we had a baby boy and he was crawling all over the bed and under the covers. Then he looked over the edge of the bed and saw the Chihuahuas and started growling at them. I thought he was saying I gave birth to a Chihuahua. My pilates teacher said to expect strange birthing dreams in later months. Like giving birth to a litter of puppies. She dreamt that she

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075397469369177872004-01-29T10:23:00.000-07:002004-01-29T10:33:19.246-07:00

Results are in from the last blood test. So far, so good. HCG levels are 1920 - more than double the first test. Good sign, says the CNM. Progesterone is 33.1 - a tad lower than last time but still in the high normal range (6.6-40.3) of a pregnancy between 4-12 weeks. Since calendars and dates are not my strongpoint and since I forgot to record the first day of my last period, we are not 100%

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075334359363869632004-01-28T16:55:00.000-07:002004-01-28T17:01:27.903-07:00

Whew, what a difference a day of hormones makes. I'm feeling a little yuck - tired and flu-ish but no fever. Had 2nd blood test - results in tomorrow morning. Planning my workload for next few months - trying to keep it manageable so I can avoid stress and overdoing it. I'm a recovering workaholic so I always have to be diligent to avoid slipping back into that frame of mind and way of life.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075244455642026932004-01-27T15:58:00.000-07:002004-01-27T16:03:03.606-07:00

Got the blood test results from Monday. So far, so good. HCG 711 (good level) Progesterone 33.7* *reference for 1st trimester (4-12 weeks) is 6.6 - 40.3 so it is on the higher side. Yay! Going back Wednesday afternoon for another. Results in Thursday. Daily Symptom Check: sore breasts a little bloaty a little dizzy getting out of bed moody - ala PMS

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075166019144018872004-01-26T18:12:00.000-07:002004-01-26T18:15:45.733-07:00

had a blood test to measure both HCG and Progesterone levels. will have another in 48 hours (Wednesday) to make sure everything is in order (HCG should double - don't know what progesterone should do but assuming it should increase). I won't take no for an answer. I'll pay for any tests that can be done. I just want data.

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075151140846929932004-01-26T13:56:00.000-07:002004-01-26T14:07:47.326-07:00

Now, for the good news. I'm pregnant again. Yes, a little more than 3 months since I miscarried, and I just triple checked with another home pregnancy test yesterday. Strange thing - took a test Thursday. Negative. Oh well, I thought, we'll keep trying (always fun to try). Saturday, still no period, but I hadn't been recording my cycle the last few months so was very confused about when it was

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1075150587876061232004-01-26T13:44:00.000-07:002004-01-26T13:58:33.653-07:00

I miscarried in early October, week 9 of my pregnancy. After a lot of research and asking around, I'm convinced that I had low progesterone levels. It seems that around week 10, the ovaries stop producing progesterone and let's the placenta take over. In some women - especially over 35 - the ovaries stop producing progesterone too soon. I'm sure this is what happened to me. In Week 6 and 7, I

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1062879493159254292003-09-06T14:18:00.000-06:002003-09-06T14:18:13.160-06:00

I spent last week in a panic over spotting. I spotted for 3 days in a row and experienced mild - I was careful to analyze them and they were mild - cramping during the day and at night. I was certain I was miscarrying. According to calculations: 1. First day of last period: July 30, 2003 2. Ovulation: around Aug 12 if you count 14 days 3. Probably conception: Aug 12 4. Implantation: 14 days

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1062353889892812192003-08-31T12:18:00.000-06:002003-08-31T12:18:09.896-06:00

Books I'm reading right now: What to Expect When You're Expecting by Heidi Murkoff, Arlene Eisenberg & Sandee Hathaway, B.S.N. The Mother of All Pregnancy Books by Ann Douglas The Girlfriends Guide to Pregnancy by Vicki Iovine The Pregnancy Book by William Sears, M.S. and Martha Sears, R.N. (recommended to me by my nurse practitioner who read it during her pregnancy - and she is about my age)

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1062353592597063352003-08-31T12:13:00.000-06:002003-08-31T12:13:12.616-06:00

G. returned right before my "prime time" in mid-August. On August 28th, Thursday morning, I was 2 days late for my period. What the heck, I thought, I'll just take a pregnancy test because I had one First Response left over and two Clear Blue Easy tests from February. Positive. Each and every one of them. Two lines. I saw a midwife I had been in touch with last year for more prenatal vitamins

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-1058742849828396192003-07-20T17:14:00.000-06:002003-07-20T17:14:09.826-06:00

It has been months, and we've been apart most of the time, at least at all the "prime times." I've started using the Donna saliva ovulation tester this past month and think I'm finally figuring out when I'm ovulating. I'll keep using it daily until I can see if I get the same results next month. Then the following month, he'll be moving here to live with me and we'll have lots of time to do

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-897495652003-02-25T19:30:00.000-07:002003-02-25T19:30:47.280-07:00

Day 3 missed period. But two pregnancy tests say negative. (For the record, Clear Blue Easy is easier to read but First Response is supposed to allow earlier testing). Feeling crampy. Might be starting now. Two months trying, not giving up. Not allowing myself to feel too disappointed or sad. It will be a lot of fun trying some more! Not sure when G. and I will get together again. Soon, I

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-896034762003-02-23T09:57:00.000-07:002003-02-23T09:57:54.810-07:00

I'm not writing here often enough. In February, we were able to be together the weekend before I thought I was ovulating, the week of, and the week after. Not sure if that will do anything, but today is the day I'm supposed to start my period and I'm trying to feel if I have cramps or sense if I'm going to start. Or not. I haven't been obsessing much this month. I even had a few drinks this

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-882004812003-01-28T22:36:00.000-07:002003-01-28T22:36:25.596-07:00

started my period yesterday. tried not to be disappointed or stressed about it seeing as how G. and I have just started trying to conceive. the plan: for the first few months just estimate ovulation based on a calendar and counting 14 days from the first day of my last period to get a timeframe, give or take 2-3 days either way. Okay, so it isn't a science, but right now, we want to be relaxed

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4116519.post-875631412003-01-16T18:07:00.000-07:002003-01-16T18:07:41.390-07:00

it is 2003 and I am just starting the process of trying to conceive. i'm 38, fairly healthy, fairly fit. i say fairly because you just don't know when you are trying to get pregnant. am i healthy enough? fit enough?

Alizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17507185202668005774noreply@blogger.com0